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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

i feel lost and hurt. 
i am crying one minute then in the next hour, i am crying again.
i am still on that emotional roller coaster.
i am scared.
i am afraid.
i have been thinking horrible thoughts about myself.
i have been thinking of suicide again.
i know i am better than this.
why must all this stuff happen to me?
i need a friend to stay with me. 
i can’t be alone in my apartment.
i can’t stop crying.
i can’t be strong anymore.
i am confused.
i am upset.
i feel like i don’t know who i am anymore.

I remember when you said ‘we can still be friends’ and all I could think was ‘no we can’t. I still want you and talking to you will just make it worse. Knowing that I can’t kiss you when we just look at each other or not being able to hold you when I’m not okay. Seeing you fall for some girl and watch you get over me is something I can’t do. Being friends is out of the question.’ But in all reality all I could say was ‘okay.’ & walk away.

gone again -______-
You are gone again and now i am left with a feeling of emptiness.
You are gone again and i am left holding my breath.
You are gone again so my bed becomes too spacious.
You are gone again so I have no reason to rush home.
You are gone again, I lay here crying.
You are gone again, I hope and wait.

1 comment:

  1. hi.. be patience ok?? hope u can solve your problem.. smile always :)